I'm starting to question a lot of my moves and strategies that has worked in the past and the tough part is that I sometimes looked towards quitting the game...
I dont want to do this but if I dont get my mojo back I'll be leaking very precious pesos if I continue to push the issue...
"What it sounds like is that you have lost your rhythm. Think of yourself as a runner in a marathon - you are in great position, breathing well and your strides are long and natural. Sometimes you get complacent - or just get hit by shit-awful luck - and you step on a sharp rock.
Some rocks you can shake off without losing stride, some you have to stop and pull out of the soles of your shoes.
Whatever it is you are dealing with, one thing is (or should be) for certain in your heart: you are not dropping out of the marathon unless someone comes over and cuts both your legs off and issues a legal document that bans you from purchasing a wheelchair. (Even then, you might get a friend to buy one for you.)
These feelings of doubt ("am i just a lucky fish whose luck has run out?") with regards to your competence are part of the life-game you are playing. Yes, even after five years (which experience-wise is much shorter if you haven't pounded your psyche to bits on the online circuit).
In many shapes and forms, i still get these feelings every other week, and even some of my higher-rolling peers, coaches, and students have come running to cry on any shoulder available when they get these "whole world is beating down on me" episodes.
I believe that anyone who claims to be completely untiltable is lying in some way - that, or he has given up on his humanity. Either way, he is unbalanced, and that can prove to be unhealthy and -EV in life.
It's good for you to be feeling this, as it will ground you and allow you to open yourself up to learning more. If anything, i hope it will make you pay more attention both to your poker game, and to what is going on inside of you.
So what do you have to do?
Take many deep breaths. Look at your spreadsheet (i hope you have kept one?) and study your undeniable consistent winning results over your last five years. Look at it with complete self-honesty (no false modesty or bravado) and be objective. Are you really just a lucky fish or a good player off-balance? Answer the question and BELIEVE.
Evaluate where your BANKROLL is at: Is it still playable at your limit? If you need a bankroll infusion, do you trust yourself to invest? Do not invest until you trust yourself completely.
Read a few of the basic books on theory and strategy if you need to remind yourself that you already know all this. You will discover a new found confidence that you have what it takes. Now go for it.
Pull that rock out of your shoe and get your rhythm back. Start again by walking briskly, then slowly break back into your run. If you have to move down stakes or revert to SSS, then do it. But do it with your complete passion and attention - with no thought of revenge, the past, or "making your money back"
Name the source of this quote: "fall down seven, get up eight."
4 comments:
"In many shapes and forms, i still get these feelings every other week, and even some of my higher-rolling peers, coaches, and students have come running to cry on any shoulder available when they get these "whole world is beating down on me" episodes."
... i had the feeling i was about to be mentioned in this post. (No, i am not your student per se bu you know what i mean :D) So yes, Ron, no quitting on this end.
I have fallen a lot times and was about to quit at one point but you said quitting is the worst option.
quitting on something you believe in is the worst option.
quitting because you studied the evidence and changed your mind (realization?) is healthy :-)
My resignation meter just went up to 80% from 50%. keywords -> Spreadsheet, BELIEVE, and passion! Thanks Coach!
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